Ladypersons
The first woman to use this term was my colleague Carrol, referring to someone we worked with. It was meant as a compliment, and I apply the term that way to this day. The ladyperson is a bit proper, but not stuffy. She will never give you too much information about herself, nor does she gossip. She blushes at off-colour jokes, but laughs. A ladyperson does not find it necessary to use profanity or obscenity. She does not scold those who do; she just ignores the language.
She does not go to see blow-'em-up movies. She tends to enjoy symphonic music, commemorative ceremonies, outdoor markets, gardening, human-rights causes, and participation in her faith community or neighbouhood initiatives. She gives blood.
You may know a single ladyperson for years and learn only a few details of her personal life. And she does have one- it's just that she is highly private. Any romantic encounters will her business alone, and often disclosed only if there is an impending marriage. A married ladyperson may share family news, but focuses on the positive. She does not do girls' weekends in Vegas.
She is classic in her personal taste: twin sets, lower heels, matched suits. Sexy for the ladyperson is a sleeveless dress. Sometimes a ladyperson has one nonconformist signature; a bold white streak in her hair, a love of dramatic capes. But her signature isn't trendy; ladypersons never got a tattoo or multiple ear-piercings. They did not do anything to their bodies then to be sorry about now.
She may have an eccentric interest: one of my ladypersons just got her black belt in Tae Kwon Do. This slip of a woman in pearls can hurl you to the next town.
I know six ladypersons; four are WASPs, one is Japanese-Canadian, and one Ukranian-Canadian, so I'm reluctant to say there is a single culture that produces ladypersons. It seems more a personality, a way of being in the world.
Many ladypersons are introverts and do not appeciate being urged to "loosen up"; I no longer wonder what it would take for them to order a few rounds of tequila shooters and duckwalk to Chuck Berry in a dive bar. They are my oases of calm, my deep, dependable and lovely friends.
I declare April 2 Ladyperson Day. The perfect foil for April 1st Fools, a day later, they smile serenely and sail on, graceful, generous and spirited, in a discreet way.
Comments
I think they're more likely from a generation that is a few away from mine.
Is this the end of the ladyperson?
I used a four-letter word (actually it was three letters but you get the idea) on my blog in frustration the other night, and woke up the next day and deleted it. Not that I'm a ladyperson per se, but I do appreciate all these attributes you've described, and I think it's worth while to aim in that direction.
It's probably not ladyperson-like to point this out, but the link on your page to The Sartorialist does not work.
sallymandy: I once heard a ladyperson once use foul language and you can't imagine the impact!
Imogen: If you seek you will find them.
Perhaps like so many species, the ladyperson has not died out, but if we cultivate and cherish her, she will continue to flourish in little crannies of this frantic life.
Allegra: Edgy is the opposite, yes! And has its appeal, but edgy is so easily noticed!
April 2nd is Daffodil Day (Jour des Jonquilles in French) and I cycled to a Greek grocery where there is good sheep's and ewe's milk cheese - It was a beautiful warm sunny day and on the sidewalk in front of the store there was a ladyperson selling daffodils for cancer research.