A new face for Valentine's Day

I remember a full pagead on the back of a newspaper: "Yes, it's a stupid, made-up holiday, but it's her favourite stupid, made-up holiday."

It's time we re-invent Valentine's Day. If you have a lover, go ahead and spoil the person, and let's revise the event to a more free-floating expression of affection, positive regard, and caring. Let's use the day as a meditation on how we might better care for others, for ourselves. (The Earth gets its turn on April 22.)

In the name of self-love, I will get dressed up a little: a French jacket of laces, brocades and matelassé; a sheer red lip stain (Sephora Cream Stain Liquid Lipstick in "French Lover") and a pair of Arche booties—the same happen to be nicely on sale just now in limited sizes. Wearing that with blue ankle jeans.

What might we do to demonstrate our love and appreciation? The little chocolate bar that's dropped by your friend's desk, the book that's delivered, or if feeling extravagant (and what opens us to extravagance as much as treating a friend?), the invitation to lunch at your favourite little spot... tomorrow is a perfect, lovely day to offer that gesture. 

I also think of women I'll never meet, who have offered me something recently (even if they will never know.)

1. Taylor Swift and Lana Wilson

On a lark I watched "Miss Americana" (Netflix) and was surprised by Taylor Swift, to whom I have listened rarely. 

At 30, there's steel inside the songbird in sequins, and I liked her—which is not faint praise, once you hear her description of who she was programmed to be since her pre-teen years: be nice, please everyone, offend no one.

The candour of this documentary owes much to the its director, Lana Wilson, (who shot with an all-female crew.) There's music and peeks at the plush star-life, but the most compelling moments are those in which the still-young Swift decides to step forward and say what she thinks, over some powerful opposition.

2. Jennifer Weiner

The journalist and novelist Jennifer Weiner wrote in the New York Times, "I Feel Personally Judged by J. Lo's Body", about her self-inflicted pressure to be 50 and look like the singer. It's wry and well-written, though personally I always suspected Ms. Lopez was created in a lab by a team of former Miss Universes and Dorian Gray.  

I did think she was a little touchy about J. Lo; who can possibly emulate her? It's like wishing your back garden looked like Versailles.


3. Christine Sinclair and Abby Wambach

The 36-year old Canadian team chanpion just broke the international record as all-time top scorer  (for men and women) in international soccer. 

With her last two goals, she surpassed the great Abby Wambach, previous record holder. On Instagram, Wambach congratulated Sinclair, saying "Your victory is our victory", and added, “And to every girl coming up in the Pack with a dream to achieve that which doesn’t yet even exist: We believe in you. Your Pack is with you. And history awaits you.”

That sportswomanship and encouragement choked me up. 

Closely-related to my wish for a reno for February 14th is the naming of today, February 13, as "Galentine's Day". I'd prefer that Valentine's Day level up to include all kinds of love, as well as being civil to everyone, just because.

But fine! A galentine to each and every one of you, for reading, for your comments, requests, and especially the sharing of experiences and resources.