When the body changes

Stylists advise women to use a tailor so that their clothes fit perfectly. Fine, but I think there is a related, pre-emptory act: buy the right size.

If that size is larger, women would rather replace a knee than move up. If she can lock in that size via more stretch in the fabric, she's interested. We cling to the dumbest aspect of vanity, the number. We may have learned not to articulate negative judgements, but have them just the same.

Or, there's the vanity-size route. Some brands cut with more room than others. Jeans from NYJD, Talbots, Gap and INC, especially in 'boyfriend', 'curvy' or 'relaxed' styles, allow us to maintain the gentle Myth of Eternal Size.

Rachel, who found her figure had filled out at its most pearish point, moved from misses to plus petite for trousers. They no longer pull across her stomach or abrade at the inner thighs—but she takes a stitch ripper to the label the moment she brings them home.

I shopped with Dianne, who was downcast when the skinny Yoga jeans she tried in her usual size were tighter than expected. She refused to even look at the next size, hauled us to the lingerie department, and bought a pair of Spanx Higher Power Shorts. We went back for her size, which just zipped after the Spanking.

The day when the size up becomes a good idea is hardly fun. Aside from one's tender ego, there is the cost of replacement, even though one might wonder, Did they change their sizing? And maybe so; it is not always you. Some brands are cutting corners and their popular styles don't fit as they did. Customer feedback for J. Crew's cashmere sweaters consistently tells them to stop cheating inches off the length.

But once you're in the Passage, most often the reckoning is due to a body shift: Your weight is within your usual range, but you might have more midriff, or a larger bust.

Lauren Hutton once said that every decade, she had to deal with such a change, and if Hutton acknowledges that, why don't we? This photo, taken in 2016 (she was age 73 then) is unretouched and shows both her body and trademark casual chic.

In 2018, she walked the runway for Valentino in typically minimal makeup—and magenta gloves.

Photo: Vouge.com

You are in Hutton's club if your dress suddenly seems shorter (and it did not shrink in the wash), your jacket feels constricting, or an unstructured shoulder makes you look slumped. .

Dianne is proud that she has been the same size for thirty-plus years and still buys the brands she wore as a young adult, like French Connection and Guess. "The trick is, wear two pairs of Spanx at once!" she said.

A few women I know do carry the same contours they had when they moved into their first apartments, but most of us have changed. I prefer to skip the shapewear, buy the size that fits—and Hutton it up in a pair of pink gloves!