Restaurants: Putting fair in the fare
Because our immediate and extended family includes cooks, oyster shuckers, restauranteurs and a sommelier, we've seen the restaurant business up close; it is not known for fair, let alone laudatory, employment practices.
As of this year, several Canadian provinces (and some US states) are increasing the minimum wage for restaurant workers. Happy Hour for them? Depends on where you're seated. Many think that employers will try to cut jobs or reduce hours, while still trying to increase the average cheque, the plasma of any operation.
What does this mean for us, as customers? Tips will still be customary, and form a significant part of the North American server's salary, even with a $3/hr pay increase.
You may notice that when a bunch of women 50 or older enter a restaurant, a waiter can deflate like a twenty-minute old soufflé. There's a stereotype that women are lousy tippers, as well as fussy, inattentive (so specials have to be repeated), and prone to leaving bags in a server's way. One of my favourite cartoons shows a waiter stopping by a table full of women to ask, "Is anything all right?"
When the cheque comes, usually someone asks what I'm tipping—but I'm not the woman you want. Mothers of restaurant workers—even former ones—view every worker as Someone's Child and thinks, Has she paid her rent this month?
No matter what you decide to add, be alert when using payment systems. When you use a credit or debit card and enter the tip by percentage, that percentage is calculated on the entire bill, including tax. It's easy to choose the 15% option, the rule of thumb for a tip for good service here, but you're actually paying more. (In the fine-dining category in large North American cities, 20%-25% is the norm, a figure that blows the minds of my European visitors.)
But if I order only, say, a $4 cappuccino in a café, I tip more, because leaving only sixty cents feels really cheap for the at least two trips to the table.
Another intangible powerfully influences ordering and tipping behaviour: the sense of how good a time you had, and you may even be psychologically manipulated. Not talking about that extra glass of chardonnay, either.
That happened to me at a posh bistro. A girlfriend and I settled in. The waiter approached the table, and, after greeting us, said to me, "Isn't this the most gorgeous evening? Such a marvellous night to be out! You two sure know how to have fun!" As he said that, he touched the back of my shoulder in the lightest, glancing way. He said, "You've been in before!" and smiled widely when I said yes.
And I thought, Holy Smokes, he's using Neuro-Linguistic Programming techniques on me, specifically those of pacing and leading. He was pacing by using those positive emotional words ("gorgeous", "marvellous", "fun") and tying them to my experience (the touch, the nod, the smile) and leading me further: to think of myself as a favoured, carefree patron... who will just naturally order the bottle of premier cru he has pointed out.
Though never an NLP practitioner, I had learned enough to spot it.
Most waiters only go as far as trying to up-sell extra drinks or a dessert, which can easily net another several hundred dollars in tips a shift on a busy night. (This annoys me; if I wanted whipped cream in my hot chocolate, I'd order it, dammit.)
Tips aside, expect to see other changes on the heels of the mandatory pay hikes. Industry consultants such as Michael von Massow predict smaller portions, more vegetarian options, and fewer exotic or out-of-season ingredients on plates.
All of these strategies will please diners who have long thought that serving sizes were too big, or who long for more meatless choices, but don't expect restaurants to lower the prices.
Frugality bloggers routinely tell readers to eschew dining out altogether, but either by necessity or by habit, forty-two percent of Canadians buy takeout or eat in restaurants once or twice a week, according to a 2017 Dalhousie University study. (Source: Global News)
Danny Meyer, one of the industry greats and author of "Setting the Table", has said that his mission as a restauranteur is "to make money while giving the impression of generosity", a job that just got harder. Meyer calls tipping, "one of the greatest hoaxes perpetrated on the American culture", adding that it lets restaurants get away with underpaying. As of 2017, he includes gratuities in the bill (following the European model) and most of his restaurants have a revenue-sharing plan.
These days, I look for a place that serves what we can't replicate at home, in an enjoyable setting, which is rarely the hot place to be seen. And if everyone in the house is being paid decently and treated with respect, that's the icing on the cake.
As of this year, several Canadian provinces (and some US states) are increasing the minimum wage for restaurant workers. Happy Hour for them? Depends on where you're seated. Many think that employers will try to cut jobs or reduce hours, while still trying to increase the average cheque, the plasma of any operation.
What does this mean for us, as customers? Tips will still be customary, and form a significant part of the North American server's salary, even with a $3/hr pay increase.
You may notice that when a bunch of women 50 or older enter a restaurant, a waiter can deflate like a twenty-minute old soufflé. There's a stereotype that women are lousy tippers, as well as fussy, inattentive (so specials have to be repeated), and prone to leaving bags in a server's way. One of my favourite cartoons shows a waiter stopping by a table full of women to ask, "Is anything all right?"
When the cheque comes, usually someone asks what I'm tipping—but I'm not the woman you want. Mothers of restaurant workers—even former ones—view every worker as Someone's Child and thinks, Has she paid her rent this month?
No matter what you decide to add, be alert when using payment systems. When you use a credit or debit card and enter the tip by percentage, that percentage is calculated on the entire bill, including tax. It's easy to choose the 15% option, the rule of thumb for a tip for good service here, but you're actually paying more. (In the fine-dining category in large North American cities, 20%-25% is the norm, a figure that blows the minds of my European visitors.)
But if I order only, say, a $4 cappuccino in a café, I tip more, because leaving only sixty cents feels really cheap for the at least two trips to the table.
Another intangible powerfully influences ordering and tipping behaviour: the sense of how good a time you had, and you may even be psychologically manipulated. Not talking about that extra glass of chardonnay, either.
That happened to me at a posh bistro. A girlfriend and I settled in. The waiter approached the table, and, after greeting us, said to me, "Isn't this the most gorgeous evening? Such a marvellous night to be out! You two sure know how to have fun!" As he said that, he touched the back of my shoulder in the lightest, glancing way. He said, "You've been in before!" and smiled widely when I said yes.
And I thought, Holy Smokes, he's using Neuro-Linguistic Programming techniques on me, specifically those of pacing and leading. He was pacing by using those positive emotional words ("gorgeous", "marvellous", "fun") and tying them to my experience (the touch, the nod, the smile) and leading me further: to think of myself as a favoured, carefree patron... who will just naturally order the bottle of premier cru he has pointed out.
Though never an NLP practitioner, I had learned enough to spot it.
Most waiters only go as far as trying to up-sell extra drinks or a dessert, which can easily net another several hundred dollars in tips a shift on a busy night. (This annoys me; if I wanted whipped cream in my hot chocolate, I'd order it, dammit.)
Tips aside, expect to see other changes on the heels of the mandatory pay hikes. Industry consultants such as Michael von Massow predict smaller portions, more vegetarian options, and fewer exotic or out-of-season ingredients on plates.
All of these strategies will please diners who have long thought that serving sizes were too big, or who long for more meatless choices, but don't expect restaurants to lower the prices.
Frugality bloggers routinely tell readers to eschew dining out altogether, but either by necessity or by habit, forty-two percent of Canadians buy takeout or eat in restaurants once or twice a week, according to a 2017 Dalhousie University study. (Source: Global News)
Danny Meyer, one of the industry greats and author of "Setting the Table", has said that his mission as a restauranteur is "to make money while giving the impression of generosity", a job that just got harder. Meyer calls tipping, "one of the greatest hoaxes perpetrated on the American culture", adding that it lets restaurants get away with underpaying. As of 2017, he includes gratuities in the bill (following the European model) and most of his restaurants have a revenue-sharing plan.
These days, I look for a place that serves what we can't replicate at home, in an enjoyable setting, which is rarely the hot place to be seen. And if everyone in the house is being paid decently and treated with respect, that's the icing on the cake.
Comments
I eat out probably twice a week and I still run into that situation - even when I've made a reservation - where, as a woman I am shown to the worst table possible - I feel that I am forced to become (politely) more forceful and vocal before I'm ever given a decent table. Not a good way to start. Yes, I do understand that women have a reputation for being more fussy - or perhaps not tipping enough - but it is my experience that this is completely false - and that in fact we tend to overtip rather than the other way around - even when we aren't treated as well as the table of males seated next to us! Perhaps the reason that some women may not tip as well as many waiters would like is because we are treated as second class patrons right from the start and if we didn't have to insist upon equal treatment before we even order our food we'd be more inclined to leave more. When I have a good experience - as I had with 5 friends this past weekend when we had TEA at the Art Gallery of Ontario - then the wait staff gets a very generous tip of 20 o 25% from all of us! It is a two way street.
PS - I also don't like to be "managed" - nor do I want my waiter to treat me like a best friend or that I'm his grandmother - I am a customer, be friendly and polite, but really, I don't need to hear all about your bad morning or the friend who is ill or where you are going after work - I like a wee bit of formality makes me much more comfortable.
On the other hand we were recently in Quebec City and had the most wonderful evening and meal at a restaurant there. Quebec seems to have a more French (France) approach to restaurant behaviour and French people are usually quiet and well behaved in restaurants and in public generally.
Bad tipping rep? I've noticed that some of my friends tend to cheap out on the tip, perhaps because they don't eat out much and aren't up to speed on current practice (15-20% here) or have generally got out of the habit of spending money. But that's another whole topic.
Could we not just pay these people a decent wage, and we as diners will pay for the food and service? I don't expect my electrician to work for a fraction of a living wage and depend on my tips...
Always timely, always thoughtful - you write one of my very favorite blogs!
love,
Janice
That said, unless the service is bad, I tip the customary 15%, and since in BC we don't have PST on meals, I don't worry about tipping on top of the tax. (When I eat out in Montreal, I always mentally prepare to add a third to the cost of the meal for tax and tips). I also tip a higher percentage if we're not drinking because I figure the wait staff should not suffer because I choose not to imbibe.
I've heard that in the US, wait staff get a couple of dollars an hour only; at least here in Canada they get the minimum wage. My American friend tells me that Canadians have a bad reputation in regards to tipping in the US as evidenced by this joke: How can you tell the difference between a Canadian and a canoe? Canoes tip...
Margie from Toronto: How a woman or group of women is treated has in my experience improved somewhat, but I too have seen and occasionally received that worst table. One time, in a now-closed but very good Toronto restaurant, I was greeted with palpable coolness by the maitre d'- until Le Duc arrived a few minutes later. Needless to say, last visit.
Ghisele et Nadine: The disproportional increase is a form of inflation that lives outside the math of the cheque and I have wondered about it too.
I do not tip more if I am not drinking wine (or whatever), because service that would have been provided (opening and pouring the wine, and possibly advising; sometimes decanting) is absent. I don't tip more if I don't eat a dessert, just because I'm choosing not to eat it. However, any rationale you have for tipping more will be appreciated by the server.
A son worked in a hip Mtl restaurant that was a favoured hangout for movie stars, F1 drivers, pro athletes. They tipped insane amounts, because they did not want it said, "Mr. Big was here last night and left a lousy tip." But Mr. Big also got the celebrity chef to sit down with his table and do shots.
Re the joke, ever notice it is told to persons identifiably Canadian? I think it's a way to guilt them into leaving more, because I have never seen more low tippers among my Canadian family versus my American one. Queen of Low Tippers was my mother, who thought that 10% was entirely appropriate and also thought in 1935 dollars all her life. We used to sneak back and leave more.
Leslie Milligan: In Canada, some restaurants have adopted that model too, and several who did went back to the old system because they had complaints- some patrons apparently felt they were not free to leave the tip amount they wanted.
Babycakes: Different restaurants have different breakdowns for sharing tips but usually the back of the house gets something. At a super high end restaurant where one son worked, the waiters had to wear special canvas and leather aprons that cost $70 each and the money for those was taken out of their tips before they were paid out. If he showed up for a shift and the restaurant had low bookings, he was sent home without pay. It's against the law, but this kind of practice happens often, and the level of the place does not guarantee equitable treatment. A horrible industry for employment practices.
And this harassment is not restricted to female workers. A gay male friend of mine constantly got hit on; it is not because he likes men that he likes you, Mr Boss!
A local note, pizza at Notre-Dame des quilles!
https://montreal.eater.com/2018/1/22/16910998/pizza-bouquet-ndq-notre-dame-des-quilles-new-york-montreal
In school days my funds were made from serving so now I’m sure to make certain the tip is representative of the service.
There definitely is a preference given to male occupied tables. The servers create their own tips. I would only tip poorly if you treat me that way.
When Le Duc returned to leave the tip Mom should have left, the manager told him, "Oh, this happens all the time! We're used to it. Thanks."
Entering "0" on the machine with the server standing right there is more obvious than leaving nothing on the table. I wonder if a person who thinks he or she is "not expected to tip" would be able to withstand such scrutiny.