Post Express Checkout: The unanticipated pleasures of a spare wardrobe
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| Too damn stuffed |
What I learned was expressed by commenter Demi-pointe:
"Perhaps the clothing cleanse is similar to the tip of slowing down one's eating during a meal to wait to allow your stomach to realize you are full. Just slow down the buying.
Stop the force feeding of one item on top of another...
Stop the force feeding of one item on top of another...
Space in the closet, space in the stomach = space in the brain. It doesn't all have to be filled to the brim."
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| Yet another pair |
But for me, the experiment was also about freedom from the need to cosset oneself by buying, from the reflexive siren call of a sale. It is the wish for, as Demi-pointe suggests, a quiet and spacious place beyond a closet.
At 62, time races by, space slows its rush. The jumble of a large wardrobe is a distraction: what to buy next, and when?
"Getting and spending", Wordsworth wrote, "we lay waste our powers." Did he begrudge himself a new Homburg?
I'll find out what lures me back to acquisition, but for now I'm enjoying the tender state of refusal. Maybe I'll fall prey to the hobgoblin of fear, fear of looking like a frump, with out of date shoes and lumpy coat.
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| Outrageously gorgeous earrings |
Fortunately my taste often outstrips my budget.
But let's drool over Marie-Helene Taillac's gemmy "Elizabeth Taylor" earrings, of amethyst, green and pink tourmaline set in 22k gold. Price $3,380 from Twist.
Oh yes.
Comments
PS Wordsworth: lay waste our powers
"Back up items" are my downfall as well. I think this comes from having spent many years in my young adulthood making very low wages and without much of a clothing budget. At that time my wardrobe was sparse, and if my one pair of jeans, wore out, it might be months before I could afford another. Like famine survivors who always keep a stocked pantry, a lot of my buying is fear-based.
I've reached the stage in my life where I could be retiring in a few years. So does it make sense to have so many business jackets that I only wear occasionally? I want to be purchasing clothing for a potential different lifestyle ahead. A 'strict' lean wardrobe appeals now.
At the same time as I edit, I want to get as much use as possible from what I have.
I do have multiples of some items -- predictably, black pants and black sweaters -- but not in outrageous numbers. (Five black pants, but that includes the grotty pair I wear to volunteer at the animal shelter so I can be drooled on; four black sweaters, including the big cosy one I put on when I get home from work, a la Mr. Rogers' cardigan.)
I've also noticed that the few things I haven't been wearing regularly just need some simple alterations to make them work -- a white blouse that needs taking in so that I don't feel like a shapeless blob in it, for example. A few more tweaks are needed to an Eileen Fisher pencil skirt that is a bit "swimmy" on me. All within reason, and a much smarter option than trying to find something that "works better." Because nothing ever works that well.
When I know I am in a mood of 'wanting' I have to be careful of just how shiny that thing is that I am attracted to. Too much shine (in the form of too expensive, too trendy, too formal, etc.) and it will probably just sit- with some negative emotion hovering over it. Not enough shine because it really is just like the other (pants, black sweater, whatever) that I own - and it will also sit - wrapped in yawns. Some magpies must always be attracted to the same shiny thing- over and over again (shoes for some).
It can be hard to find that...place of balance- to enjoy satisfying a 'want' of a new and shiny thing but not to tip over into a stuffed nest.
Duchesse, it kind of reminds me of tree pose!
Mary: Changing size is ideal time to pare the closet. When I'm not happy with my size, will buy things that are only OK out of gratitude for finding anything. Thanks for our appreciation!
Northmoon: I'm in same place, semi-retired with bursts of work, so have some soft jackets, but no more power suits! Twin sets also work well.
materfamilias: I propose that there is a spot between too much and too little, and that spot may change depending on mood and living space.
Fuji: I do not subscribe to that system of aesthetics, but have never accommodated much clutter. Though I had a large wardrobe, it hung (hangs, for I still have most of it) in well-organized closets :)
LPC: That level, such as Graf, does not incite my dreams; the gems are so large that they're surreal. I'm more transported to dreamland by the design, rather than magnificence. Hmmm, but would I say no to a 15ct emerald cut?
Rubi: My experience with alterations is mixed, only 25% or so really do the trick. I spent $150 having an expensive jacket taken in and it just did not look right. (This by a shop that works regularly on Chanel.)
MJ: Good for you! I've done various rounds of major reducing over the years. Only maybe twice have I gotten rid of a piece I wish I'd kept. Most of the time, after 2 months, can't even remember what it was.
Demi-pointe: I've never favoured the shiny, look-at-me items (despite earrings shown). My magpie tendencies show up re pearls, and I have not given myself any orders about laying off.
One is a La Florentina camel-colored cape with fox fur trim. My life is not at all in alignment with wearing that piece, EVER. But oh, I wanted it. So I clicked "Buy". I should have resisted, even though I know I will love it and will want to keep it. Sigh. I need more self-control.
I have brown and black and camel trousers in various sizes and styles, and jackets too. At one point I altered quite a few larger items to fit my slimmer size. Of course now I wish I had those items in larger sizes.
How does one handle the burgeoning closet problem when this is the issue?
At the time I had them altered, I was SURE I would not gain the weight again. Sigh....
But if you decide to return, you will know that's the thing to do.
re all the sizes: my guess is that the extremes will fall away. Those are the stats, YMMV.
Susan: I put serious money into accessories and less into clothes.
A big surprise for me was that I actually wore fewer than 12 items --
10 to be exact, or 11 if you count the coat. They were:
black pencil skirt
gray pencil skirt
black cargo pants
gray trouser jeans
jeans
gray long-sleeved low-neck tee
gray 3/4 sleeve tee with ruffle detail
black v-neck tee
brown scoop neck tee
white long sleeved, long tee
cornflower blue cotton jacket
The brown tee didn't get much wear, and neither did the trouser jeans,
since they have to be drycleaned. I cheated on a couple of days when I
hadn't washed my black skirt, and substituted a dry-clean-only one.
What I learned? this was much, much, much easier than I thought it
would be, and very freeing. I could actually get up in the morning
knowing what I was going to put on without thinking about it, or
thinking about it for less than a minute. I brought more of my jewelry
and scarves into rotation, and I had fun playing with makeup and
shoes.
I also learned that I look better in skirts, and honed in on that
specific silhouette as something that really works for me and that I
don't need to vary.
Now, a week or so after, I still find myself wearing these 10 or 11 items,
adding very little to it. Next? On to the closet purge.
Thanks for the challenge -- it was really worth it.
Like spacegeek, I have clothes that I'm hoping to fit back into someday that I'm still hanging onto, and things I had taken in that now I wish I hadn't. That's the next frontier for ruthless editing, I think.
Some things I'll purge, and some will drop away by attrition.
And- as if I needed it- the experiment shows me that accessories are often a better investment than high end clothing- and no size worries!