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| Jennifer Hudson, Oprah |
Jennifer Hudson was on Oprah last week (Feb. 10), talking about her stunning weight loss. Oprah had to drag the number out of her: 80 lbs.
Hudson kept repeating the mantra that it was not about the number, but Oprah, who has run up and down more scales than Glenn Gould, differed.
Finally Hudson's Weight Watchers leader, Liz, (who, if I am not mistaken is also in the ads with her) permitted her to reveal the digits; Hudson got a standing ovation.
I sometimes watch Oprah while on the treadmill, and I was on that damn treadmill to stay merely ample and blow off some of the stress about this move. (I'm a WW Lifetime Member, 15 lbs above where WW wants me, but where I can maintain my weight. Since WW lets you weigh more as you age, by the time I'm 137, I'll be back in my target range.)
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| Debbie Reynolds, Carrie Fisher, Oprah |
Yesterday (Feb. 15), Carrie Fisher appeared (with Debbie Reynolds); she is now pitching for Jenny Craig.
Fisher, by her account, continues to have
Fisher, by her account, continues to have
challenging mental health issues. She's funny, sad, searching.
I wondered, would the rigour of the diet be good for her? I hope she has solid people giving her guidance; she seemed fragile.
And I wondered, how much can a woman take on?
Hudson, as everyone knows, lost her mother, brother and nephew in a horrendous murder. Fisher has struggled with addiction and breakdown; her manic depressive condition requires constant monitoring, with shock therapy scheduled every six weeks.
And they want to be thin, too.
Hudson is there–and says at size 6 she does not want to get any smaller. Fisher looks to be at about Hudson's starting point. I wish her well, and at the same time found myself wondering if such a public endeavour is good for her. I was worried for her–something in her eyes.
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| Roseanne Barr |
And in a perfect trifecta, Roseanne Barr appeared the day before yesterday (Feb. 14), salty and opinionated, showing vestiges of her formerly troubled self, a self-described "Nut Barr"–and another woman of size.
She had a gastric bypass in 2004 and at first I didn't recognize her, though not because of her figure; she is still queenly.
With the tension and anger drained from her face, she looked like another person.
Three in a row here, and I think Oprah intends a message. Everything comes and goes: troubles, health, men, fame, weight: all is ebb and flow.
And what is right for each one? In the glare of the public eye, each woman has pursued a slim body. Will that augment their hard-won equilibrium, or is it just another cultural imperative, another "must do" to gain approval from the public?
I'm asking the question not to judge them, but wondering what you think.
29 comments:
This is a hard one Duchesse. I think the celebrities who do the public weight loss thing use being under public scrutiny as a motivator. It would work for me I'm sure.
For me, being thin is being able to comfortably wear a size 10---not nearly thin in the eyes of most.
I think most women yearn to be the kind of attractive that others will compliment and notice--and, in our society, that means thin.
Add to that the fact that thinner women are better clothes hangers.
Like you, I don't judge anyone for their desire to be thin. I WISH it was not such a focus.
I know what you mean about Carrie Fisher: to think of that unsparing intelligence, honesty and wit of hers turned in on itself makes me wince. And being about the same height and age, I understand how difficult--and at some level, absurd--it becomes to remain forever "petite". If I were in the public eye like these women, I would feel scraped raw. I think most of us need to go underground at times, to let go and attend to other things. And I must remind myself that the most radiantly beautiful women I've known (I can think of 3 or 4) were all completely unselfconscious and unconcerned with appearance. Thanks for this post, Duchesse.
C.
I can't really "take someone else's inventory" as the 12-step expression goes, but I worry about Carrie Fisher especially. Losing weight, with whatever method, requires a lot of mental focus and making permanent changes (and even then one might not be able to maintain a weight as low as desired). It's stressful, especially at first. The thing I dislike about how our culture frames attempts at weight loss is to set up a dichotomy of success or failure, when as you said, it's more of an ebb and flow. What if Carrie finds that maybe her metabolism (or meds) prevent her from losing as much weight as she desires? Will the media beat her up for it? Will she beat herself up? Will she be able to say, "I made healthy changes, but this is where I landed and I'm satisfied"?
I'm happy to see that Jennifer Hudson isn't going for a Hollywood definition of "thin" (skeletal) though she is quite slender now.
I am struck by the way in which diet organizations (Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, etc.) have now turned to celebrities as spokespeople rather than "regular" women. On the one hand, it points out that all women have recurring (and unsolvable?) weight/food/management issues. It also strikes me that we are, more and more, treating these issues as "on-going." Oprah's weight is a renewable story: loss, gain, new diet, more exercise, new trainer, new health guru, etc.--never solved, always in front of her. Can we talk about something else?
Looking at the women in my life, I equate the desire to be thin with the desire to be in control. So much of our lives are beyond our influence....adult children and their marriages, business stress, etc. Eating and exercise is a way to have some semblence of control. For years I was a long distance runner. Eventually I started to see that most other runners seemed to have some sort of disorder. They had to run 10 miles per day - not 9.5. They had to turn square corners, not cut the corner and save a few yards. I don't want to be a part of that obesession anymore. I'm a boring size 12.
At my stage in life being healthy is more important than the number on the scale. Weight is only one factor in a healthy lifestyle. I feel there is too much focus on weight and I'm suspect of these tv celebrity discussions which seem like a sales pitch for diet plans/programs.
Darla
Susan: Could it also be about money? I'm guessing these contracts are quite well-paid, and it keeps the performer's name out there. (I see Jennifer Hudson every week, for example.)
Anonymous/C.: There Fisher was with her preternaturally adorable mother, still thin and petite. I agree, unselfconsciousness allows a woman's essence to come forward, and that is beauty.
Pseu: Great point. Some of the celebs seem to have shorter "journeys": Whoopi Goldberg and Felicia Rashid did not seem to continue as long as Valerie Bertinelli... or am I imagining this? Queen Latifah got "a size healthier" and then vanished. Whatever the outcome Fisher will make very sharp observations (though maybe not while under Jenny Craig's sponsorship.)
Pearl: Did wonder why I was watching this "same story" when I could have been watching the news or a home decorating show. (Wait, that's the same story too :) )
Genuine Lustre: I've heard that said about the root cause of eating disorders- the desire is to be in control. Applause for your decision to take a more relaxed route!
I have seen some women at my health club, very slim- two spinning classes in a row and complaining in the change room about how "fat" they are.
Darla: That's pretty much what Hudson said, when she declined to give the number. Of course they are promoting their program; any celeb who gets to Oprah is promoting a book,program, movie etc. No actress is going to go on Oprah and talk about her diet without being well paid to do so.
Think for a moment of all the young startlets, emaciated, what they'll be like when they hit menopause. Already Gwyneth Paltrow has osteopenia. Will these women wind up, like Karen Carpenter, with heart failure? Or crippled by bone disease? I'm "fortunate" in that I'm small by social standards, but that's partly due to illness. I hate it when I've been really sick and lost weight, and people tell me how great I look. And yet, when I'm unable to exercise and put on weight, I curse myself for "letting myself go." Both ends of the spectrum are poisonous.
The whole thing is heartbreaking to me. Think of what these women have accomplished--Roseanne adn Oprah broke major race and class barriers on TV. Carrie Fisher emerged from her Hollywood childhood as a witty writer and good actress, and now is helping to de-stigmatize mental illness.
Like Susan, I wish thinness was not such a focus.
I saw an quote from Martha Stewart in Harper's Bazaar. When asked what she would advise her younger self, she said "Never, ever, ever, ever gain an ounce of weight." I thought, "THAT's what you have to say, after all you've endured and accomplished?" I was infuriated. But after reading your post, perhaps I'm a bit more sympathetic.
I'm probably in denial. I'm getting tired of people talking about weight in the guise of "being healthy". Yeah, that's great, but it is the same issue just with new words. How much can we all take on? I think we do our best, even when we are flailing around--life is tough!
I think we'd do better to be kinder to ourselves and be more forgiving of our own faults and thereby more forgiving of others' faults.
Gretchen: It's rough for any mature actress still in the public eye, whether she stays gaunt or gains. Some of the public expects them to stay frozen in time and is mean when like anyone else, they change.
Jane W. That Martha Stewart quote shocked me; read it three times to make sure. Wonder why she said that. (I'm guessing b/c she finds it so hard to lose.)
Like you, I wish the emphasis were not on weight (Roseanne's segment wasn't; she's promoting her new reality show), but Fisher and Hudson are paid to get out there and promote those programs- and Oprah knows what attracts an audience.
spacegeek: "Health" may be an acceptable screen for someone in the public eye. At the same I like the emphasis on results such as lower blood pressure and improved mobility, not just "all the cute clothes I can wear".
It seems like such a loaded issue. There is only so much that anyone can take on and I am tired of so much focus on this one thing, as if weight alone can determine the worth of a person.
I increasingly become frustrated with the equation of thinness with health. Yes some thin people are healthy and some are not; many people with some extra weight on them are healthier than some of their thinner compatriots. But of course admitting that would be bad for business. In the elderly population extreme thinness is not necessarily an advantage, although many elderly women too, become obsessed with weight made more tragic as their ability to reason through the issue fades.
I sincerely try NOT to get my cues from others, but I DO have an on-going and personal "issue" with weight. Truth is, I DO feel better when I am at a healthy weight. I have more energy, enjoy wearing the kind of clothes that I like, my emotional health is better, etc.
I wish it were otherwise, but it's not....for me. This IS my reality.
Duchesse, I also dont watch tv, so I only see photos and have to base my opinions on those you shared. It's incredible seeing Roseanne: she looks like anyone but herself, but in a good way, and wholly unrelated to weight. Content, not bitter, as you said, and she looks beautiful--the hair color is quite flattering, too. I see Meryl Streep as my role model, and used to admire Kate Winslet, although she seems to be buying more into the "change" mode. Think, too, of Brigitte Bardot today...it all gets back to peace with oneself, and I fear we are at war instead.
mardel: While thinness does not equal health, the data about *morbid obesity's* correlation to increased risk for many health concerns are well-validated.
I don't like the huge, sweeping generalization about weight and health, though, and thank yo ufor raising it.
Rebecca: Well, that's me, too- and the weight I feel OK about is way higher than in my young adult years. I just love seeing women of all sizes who feel good in their skins. Find I am disturbed by women who are ultra-thin, because I think that (though there are exceptions, and I knew one) they are starving.
Gretchen: I've never had a TV either, so missed Roseanne's series, but saw, during her later years how she was struggling personally. On Oprah she spoke about the damage she did in her out of control phase; I was impressed by her taking responsibility.
Her hair seems natural brown with a good bit of grey. She wore soft, loose (but not baggy) clothes which added to her transformed look- what I call "dressing happy".
Meryl Streep is a good model, she looks "bien dans sa peau" too.
oh my, what a complex topic....
Yes, WW does pay a substantial retainer fee to its spokesperson. I'm sure JC does as well.
Another tangent to consider: The Oregonian ran an interesting article in today's paper about a Buddhist leader who holds retreats on food and spirituality. As Geneen Roth has written, so may of our disordered ideas/relationships with food really have to do with out disordered relationships with our souls and spirits...
And add me to the list of those who are worried about Carrie Fisher. But perhaps the intensiveness of the JC regimen may help a little? She will be getting all of her food from those people, so she'll have a new posse to check in with.
Jean S: Thank you,I'm going to look for that article, sounds important. Food is a strategy for meeting many needs of body, mind and spirit.
Hope the experience is entirely positive for Carrie Fisher. At times when losing (40+lbs after my sons were born, took most of a year) I felt shaky emotionally at times, and thought of that when I saw her.
Here's what I've come to realize. I have a certain amount of will power, and no more. I can use it on keeping alcohol usage low, on eating well, on exercising, on staying up to date on paperwork, or on my blogging and work endeavors. And I bet we are all like this. We can take on weight only inasmuch as we have room in our lives to do so. And if it's not about health, frankly, it isn't as important as any of the other things we deal with.
What a great question (or series of questions). I agree about Carrie Fisher - she does seem very fragile. And I second Jane W's comment that it's tragic that such talented women (and this also of course applies to non-celebrities) are still judged/judging themselves on their weight.
Tiffany: I posted awhile ago on the Tri-Delt sorority's project to end Fat Talk, IMO an important step- and it has changed me. So hope Fisher is able to take this on (assuming it's what she truly wants) and maintain her health and work.
LPC: "A certain amount of will power and no more" is perhaps why at least 90% of us gain and lose the same pounds, or stay on top of the paperwork but then one day just stop for awhile. It's hard to keep up the discipline when the positive consequence is intangible, infrequent or not all that rewarding.
I am on a pretty strict media diet and have been for years. When I am exposed to Oprah or Jenny Craig ads, I find them pretty and the whole weight issue rather dull. I am interested in healthy and fitness, period.
Three words: "Results not typical"
Most women who lose large amounts of weight gain it back, lose it, gain it back... each cycle makes it harder to lose weight, as the body adapts to fewer and fewer calories. And there is a growing body of evidence that this cycle is much worse for one's health than maintaining a steady, albeit heavier, weight over the course of one's life.
Low weight = health is a big fat canard.
What would a man do? Put on a natty suit and celebrate his eccentricity. What do these poor women do? More plastic surgery (Carrie Fisher can barely speak thanks to a combo of prescription medication and whatever's been pumped into her lips), and then a diet regime to be what ... thin? It's madness. Isn't one of the great pleasures of aging is to have the wisdom to dodge these traps at last. I find the whole subject quite discouraging but thank you for linking it together.
Anonymous: I'm grateful, given your conscious consumption of media, that you visit here. Thank you.
Rubi: Morbid obesity increases risk for a number of issues. So thin does not equal healthy but normal weight range supports (not ensures) good health.
L'age moyen: Thanks for this take! I think the 'average' man would do just what you said (or nothing). The male celeb would have a hair transplant, botox or a jowlectomy like Michael Douglas and then divorce his wife for his 26 year old girlfriend.
I wish Oprah did a show on "the wisdom to dodge these traps".
Yes, extremes of weight on either end of the spectrum tend to be unhealthy. But the place where things get gnarly is in the middle, where there is (as ought to be expected) a lot of variation.
In my opinion, using BMI, particularly, as an indicator or predictor of health is a mug's game. BMI doesn't take into account anything beyond height or weight. Not age, not level of fitness, not muscle mass. As a result, there are a number of elite athletes who would be classified as "obese" according to their BMIs. Much better to look at waist to hip ratio, which is a lot more accurate as a predictor of risk, especially for women.
(By the way, Kate Harding's Flickr set, "Illustrated BMI Categories" is a real eye-opener.)
Rubi: Waist to hip ratio is rapidly becoming a favoured predictor to determine risk factors for heart disease, diabetes etc. No matter what measure one uses, some kind of "yellow light' and 'red light' for morbid obesity is useful, even if the assessment method is imperfect.
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